Bookseller jokes

Are there any? If so, I don’t know them. I know a good author joke:

Q: “How many authors does it take to change a lightbulb?”

A: “But why do I have to CHAAAAANGE it?”

but no bookseller jokes. This ends today, because you are all a clever lot.

So, when I say:

“How many booksellers does it take to change a lightbulb?”

You say:


10 comments so far

  1. mdegs on

    We don’t have any lightbulbs in stock but we can order you one and have it in 3-5 business days.

  2. Jason Smith on

    Three. One that will take the opportunity to handsell books on why Tesla was more important than Edison, one to tell the story about how when Cormac McCarthy was a poor struggling writer, he used to bring his own high-wattage light bulb to motels, so he could see what he was writing and one that actually remembers that there’s life outside books and grabs a ladder to change it.

  3. Tess on

    That particular light bulb is no longer available, but if you tell me a little about what/why you liked it, I’d be happy to help you a new one I’m sure you’ll enjoy.

  4. Tess on

    *help you choose a new one

  5. Harriett on

    Four. One goes to get the light bulbs in the storage room, but notices on the way that the religion section is really out of order and there’s a book by Vonnegut on the bottom shelf, so she stops to reorganize the shelves. The second gets the light bulbs and declares that her research on CFLs indicate they will use less energy and cost less in the long run, so she walks to the local hardware store to purchase some. The third takes center stage and tells the joke about the bookseller who won the lottery. Who says there are no jokes about booksellers? Remember, the grand poo-pah prize of millions of dollars? And when interviewed about what she would do with all those millions, the bookseller said she’d just keep on selling books until the money ran out.

    Meanwhile, the boss grabbed the ladder and changed the light bulb while no one else was paying attention.

  6. Kelly Justice on


    Light bulbs?!?

    I knew I forgot something.

    Do we really need them? You know: budget and all.

    (Bump) Oh sorry about that. Did you need something?

    Wait…I’ll open up the door so we can see better.

    Now. How can I help you?

  7. lee on

    All of the unemployed ones.

  8. Laurie Halse Anderson on

    People who care about the hallowed traditions of publishing know that it is better to curse the darkness than change anything.

  9. JFallone on

    One to return all the lightbulb packages for credit and the rest of the staff to take the bulbs home for personal use.

  10. laura on

    One, but if you’re interested in that lightbulb, let me show you this other one you might like!

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